"coins in my cup"This week's prompt for Poetry Thursday is to write as if you are someone other than yourself. Besides mrs heartwell, I've gotten to know a woman I call crazy sally. I've written about her but never in her voice. So, I thought I'd give it a try ... this is what I got.
my name is sally
i’m sixty-three
found two dollars
in change not enough
for coffee a sandwich
tuna on rye
lettuce a slice of tomato
i’ll wait
a few crusts here
and there collect
coins in my cup
watch for the cop
no loitering
sleeping
in doorways
on grates
it’s winter
i’m tired
almost out
of aspirin my knees
the pain so sharp
it’s hard to move
fast when
big john
comes
he scares me
yells and shouts
tries to grab
my hair
when he’s
drunk
i lost my comb
the other day
when i fell
in the street
cars kept coming
no one stopped
it’s cold
i need
a place
in the sun
no wind
tonight
it could
snow
jzr
9/13/06
8 comments:
You've really captured Sally's voice, and drawn the reader right into that sad and frightening world of homelessness. Very moving...
I think is pretty amazing. The short lines work well, and really capture the rhythm of a slightly senseless rant. Nice job!
That is so very well done. The line that just really caught my heart completely was "I lost my comb". Such a small thing, and such a big thing! Thank you.
hello. my first visit to your blog: i like the crisp way you capture sally's voice.
Yes, Sally really speaks to me through this poem. Well done.
hello! this was great. great description and insight into us really being able to feel close to sally and her life.
Such a powerful poem - very touching and sad - and all too real. With your words you've captured the sad way of life for too many people. The minute I read this, I immediately thought of a homeless woman I used to see on occasion in San Mateo, California.
i need
a place
in the sun
lovely.
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